Thursday, July 5, 2012

The Wedding, part III

With about four months (holy @#$%!!) left before "The Ukrainian" and I are having our wedding, I've been getting a whole lot of small-talk regarding my progress. 

I don't bring up the subject on my own; people just find weddings to be a relatable subject, I guess.  I'm pretty sure I do the same with my soon-to-be-married friends, and there are a LOT of them.  (I also have a ton of expecting friends, too... people are really going through a lot of changes this year!)  I'm not sure if it's the whole "Year of the Dragon" thing or not, but there is a whole cluster of engaged or just-married people at work... as well as many of my former grad school classmates and even some friends.  Go wedding industry, go. *sarcasm*

As the date looms closer, I am starting to lose my enthusiasm again.  It did go up briefly after finding the dress, but I think it was more of a relief or my friends' enthusiasm rather than my own true energy.  NOTE: The dress above is NOT "the one," but it was in the final few contenders.  I can't force myself to feel something I don't want to feel, and right now, I am just crossing whatever limbs I've got in hope that I don't totally blow the "future house fund" in exchange for a large (to me), potentially me-centered gathering.

To date, here are some of the major milestones:

1) Florist is booked.  While I wanted to be more hands-on with the decorations, I decided that this was something I didn't want to attempt.  I think enough people discouraged me from going that route, and since I don't really have a bridal party, I figure it's better to let the pros do it.  So this item went a bit over-budget, but I'm pretty happy with the selections we made... it would have been too much for me right now to do these things myself.

2) Invitations and reply cards are about to be printed.  No, they won't be fancy, but I honestly don't reckon that people will be saving these as heirlooms.  I'll hold on to one for future generations, but that's about it.  To be sent at the end of the summer (and a few sooner than that since I will get some rare in-person opportunities with some people).

3) Entertainment is booked.  Besides something I'm keeping under wraps, one of my best buds is emcee-ing, which should entertain some of my other guests for sure. =)

4) Officiant has agreed to do our ceremony.  I am not going to reveal too much about this yet, but this was a big concern of mine.

5) Make-up artist!  I don't know how to DIY makeup to save my life, so I hired the makeup artist who essentially made me over for my engagement photos.  Along with this will come veil, jewelry, and accessory rental... knocking many birds out with one stone (excuse the cruelty of that phrase)!  I already have my shoes, too... a random under-budget purchase a few months back.

6) As mentioned above, dress is found.  It needs a couple of minor alterations and a good steam, so I'm bringing it over to my place of choice late September/early October.  Majorly under-budget for this item, so I'm pretty happy about that!

7) Honeymoon is booked.  My vision of a post-wedding honeymoon is sort of happening... a few days after the ceremony with a couple of work days in between.  We'll be in Hawaii... bucket-list will be checked!

8) Photographer is (nearly) confirmed.

There is still a lot to do, unfortunately.  A lot of the remaining details have to do with the particulars of the ceremony, which makes me a bit underwhelmed when I try to think about them.  The part I'm looking forward to most about that day, frankly, is eating cake (another item that still needs to be addressed!!).  In my earlier post, lots of comments left emphasized that the marriage is the most important thing -- and I think that's off to a great start already because we've both found the right partner.

I don't want to seem like I'm totally negative about all this -- I do look forward to having some sort of formal beginning to this marriage -- even if it (edited to add: the ceremony, not the marriage!!) does seem a little forced.  Part of me still worries about bringing together two families that will only know each other via this union, and part of me still struggles to understand my relationship with my own family and whether anything I ever do will seem legitimate.  People will always judge, and I gotta get over that.

Another wedding-related post is currently being drafted, so stay tuned for that if you're inclined.


  1. You're totally on track. We just sent out our invites and we're in late summer.

    I can get behind spending on food, reception, entertainment, etc. That all feels like it's for the guests and I'm happy to entertain. I'm not so keen on spending for myself. I think the money that "hurt" most to spend was for the dress.

    I'm starting to get a little overwhelmed. I have less time these days, but it helps that going in to the homestretch I'll have the help of a professional planner and my mom and sister will have more time due to breaks from work/school.

  2. I think your wedding day will be awesome. Everybody will see you as a beautiful happy bride..Cheers!! (:

  3. Wow...I can totally relate to all of this. "Loom" was the perfect word for me, as well; I dreaded and abhored the entire planning process. We were married on June 2 and I wanted NONE of the pomp and circumstance. I firmly held my ground for an informal, open-house, cocktail party.

    Just know that the actual day WILL come and it WILL be awesome (promise). This is what I say, pretty much daily, to my husband: "It was unbelievable and amazing. I would never do anything like it again."

  4. You are chipping away at that list, girl! You seem to be on top of it, to me :)

  5. Nice job on getting that list done. Don't worry about what others think. It's YOUR day - not theirs.